One of the absolute hardest things about living abroad is not always being able to be there.

All of the last week, my grandfather had been fighting his last losing battle for his life in a hospital on the other side of the world. He had been suffering of Alzheimer’s the last few years, and finally decided it was time to go Saturday morning, thankfully in a peaceful sleep and surrounded by family.

He was the kindest, most happy, content man I knew, with a very gracious heart, always patient and positive, and exceptionally slow to anger. I can only wish I was as good and strong a man as he was. He is my dad’s hero—rightfully so (although you fill the shoes pretty well pop)—and he will forever serve as an amazing role model who I hope to live up to and make proud.

I was particularly close with him as he played a large part in raising me, and I actually never once in my life remember seeing him angry, aggressive, or even hardly upset. I remember how he used to make my sister and I pancakes, waffles, and oatmeal nearly every morning as kids. And how he genuinely seemed to be able to fix or build just about anything…

He built us a sandbox, a playhouse (2 full stories!), a tree house, a go cart, a telegraph machine, pianimals (like, animals made out of piano keys), and probably loads of other things. I remember staying the night at our grandparents’ house every once in a while, and he and I used to stay up late watching episodes of NOVA on public television, learning about the universe or ancient Egypt…

He lived a long, healthy, extremely happy life.

Grandpa fought for five days, and only left on his own terms… It was time to go.

I’m only sad I couldn’t be there at the end to touch him reassuringly on the hand and say goodbye (it’s strange, it gives you very mixed feelings, torn, maybe it’s almost selfish in the end, really), but I had a lot of good time with him my last two visits home, and years of fond memories.

In loving memory of the great Robert L. McKibben, 1929–2012, a truly virtuous man who will be sorely missed by the big happy family he raised.

robert mckibben dog Mickey

robert mckibben los angeles california 1946

bob mckibben newport beach california

robert mckibben california 1951

mckibben family

mckibben family fullerton california 1970

bob mckibben drinking

bob cody mckibben sacramento california

bob jaime cody mckibben sacramento california

Moscow russia St. Basil's Cathedral

robert mckibben wedding california

larry robert mckibben yosemite california

bob mckibben 50th anniversary

mckibben Bodega Bay california

robert mckibben piano

grandpa used to play this beautiful song

robert jaime mckibben california

bob larry mckibben san francisco california

robert cody mckibben california

bob cody mckibben sacramento california

cody bob larry mckibben

If there is one thing I hope my grandfather could be remembered by it is his joy and his unconditional love. Many of you have already sent your thoughtful and heartfelt condolences, so don’t feel the need to do that, but simply make the most of your time here and enjoy the little things in life. Don’t waste what you’ve been given.

I love you Grandpa.