Create your own luck and open yourself up to opportunities.

It’s the same reason that I am so passionate about helping people use the relatively-new power of the web to build blogs and brand themselves. This is the first time in history when we, as individuals, can easily compete with the big brands to build our reputation and authority, build businesses, and create global communities of like-minded people. I love showing people how to use blogs and social media to cultivate opportunities for themselves because they are what have empowered me to be so successful. But the web is not the only way to open up your life to great opportunities.

I subscribe to the maxim which says there is no such thing as luck, but that rather you create your own luck. And you do it by being as prepared as you can for opportunity when it arises. The wider you cast your net, the more likely you’ll be able to take advantage of those opportunities that present themselves in your life.

If you find yourself unfulfilled, it’s likely because something—your job, your relationship, your friends, the place you live—isn’t fully meeting your needs. That’s not to say your significant other or your friends aren’t great people. But you need to go out there and find fulfillment. Unfortunately, no one else is going to ensure your needs are met—we’ve all got to look out for ourselves first. If you’re lacking, if you’re unhappy or depressed, it ain’t easy and it ain’t fun, but you are responsible for going out and getting your needs met.

If we’re talking about a close relationship or a job, it’s always hard to give up the time and energy you’ve put into something you care so much about. But if it doesn’t completely meet your needs, you’ll have to risk the comfort and the years you put into something in exchange for the chance at becoming truly happy and fulfilled.

The willingness to risk the comfort of the familiar to find your true happiness is the path to living a remarkable life.

The key to living remarkably—living according to your own passions and desires—is overcoming many of the fears and beliefs that are socially programmed into us. To embark on this journey of complete fulfillment, you have to examine and question your assumptions. For example, ask yourself questions like these:

• Who says you can’t talk to people you don’t know in the bar/club?
• Who says you have to hang out with people in your age/race/income group?
• Who says you can’t leave a 7-year relationship if you’re unhappy with it?
• Who says living abroad is more dangerous or difficult than living in the town you grew up in?
• Who says you have to do what all the cool kids are doing (or follow a conventional career path/lifestyle)?

Many of us have beliefs like these ingrained in us and may not even realize it, but we allow our social conditioning to dictate how we live our lives. Ask yourself what evidence there is to actually back up these assumptions. Most of these beliefs and social “rules” are unfounded.

Anytime you see a majority of people behaving a certain way, ask yourself if it’s really necessary—if it really aligns with your personal beliefs and passions—before you jump on the bandwagon. Are you doing this because of peer pressure? (Yes, peer pressure still exists when you are 35 or 65!) Or are you avoiding doing something out of fear? Don’t let social rules dictate how you live your life.

Here are a few principles I’ve learned from making some huge changes myself, overhauling my life, and moving abroad:

1. If you feel pulled toward something, race towards it. A friend of mine was recently telling me how she feels stagnant living in our hometown and has been thinking a lot about what it would be like to live in Boston. She likes the city and has extended family nearby. My advice was to recognize that she’s attracted there and embrace it!
2. Big life changes are not as scary as they seem initially. Before I left for Thailand, I was scared shitless! Pulling up all your roots, packing up everything you own (or selling it all!), and putting yourself at the mercy of the unknown is never easy. But whether it’s a move, a breakup, or a career change, we frequently make things out to be much bigger in our heads than they turn out to be in reality.
3. Human beings adapt to new environments really fast. Whether you want to leave your cubicle to start a business of your own, establish new social circles, or travel the world, one thing I’ve learned is that you will get used to a new lifestyle, routine, or surroundings incredibly quickly. Extreme example: I adapted to being surrounded by riots, soldiers and gunfire and overcame any initial fear much quicker than I would have imagined.
4. Even if your goal doesn’t pan out as planned, you’ll still experience valuable personal growth. I told my friend who wants to move to Boston, even if she were to end up completely lonely (and what are the chances she won’t make any friends) and it’s not what she hoped for, taking action to make a huge life change that you’re compelled to make will force you to grow and develop in ways you didn’t anticipate. That’s the most fun part!

Hopefully these principles can help you in your own quest for happiness.

There always have been and always will be a small subset of the population who lead remarkable lives. They choose not to allow social conditioning to hold them back from doing big things. They examine their desires, their passions, and their needs and ask scary questions. They take action. The question is: will you choose to be one of them? Will you lead a remarkable life?

NEXT STEPS:

• Steve Pavlina has a really interesting article on getting your needs fulfilled.
• I highly recommend Jonathan Mead’s awesome Reclaim Your Dreams ebook on Illuminated Mind.
• Finally, stay tuned to Thrilling Heroics for more about overcoming fear and living the life you want!

Featured photo credit: TuTuWoN

Read the original article on Thrilling Heroics here: Live a Remarkable Life

I’ve been reading one of the most influential books of my life: Napoleon Hill’s Think and Grow Rich. This 1937 classic contains the principles that led people like Andrew Carnegie, Charles M. Schwab, Thomas Edison, and many others, to great wealth and success. As a young man, Napoleon Hill met the steel magnate Andrew Carnegie, who instilled in him his most important business teachings. Over the course of twenty years, Hill interviewed about five hundred of the most successful businessmen and leaders in the U.S. and the world, to understand more about the common beliefs that helped lead to their great success.

What these 500 individuals had in common is also what forms the foundation for the newer book and now movie, The Secret. While they give a decent introduction to a very powerful idea, I feel that the practitioners in that film greatly oversimplify this principle which many of the world’s rich and powerful share.

After talking at length with my sister about the concepts in Hill’s Think and Grow Rich—what some call mind over matter, visualization, the “Law of Attraction”—we decided that the most effective way to describe the “Carnegie secret” succinctly is this:

You become that which you think about most.

You also attract the things and accomplish the goals that you think about most. But the first step to great success is to know specifically what you want out of life: financially, personally, socially, etc. In other words, what you occupy your mind with most prominently will eventually, in one way or another shape your reality. I find that most people I talk to, even though I love many of them dearly, don’t really know what they want to achieve in life. But if you think about it critically, the principle fits with most of what we know about life. People who concentrate solely on achieving some sort of success may fail ten times before they become a great success seemingly “overnight,” but those who don’t fill their heads with grand aspirations rarely see great success, and those who stop concentrating on their highest goals and start believing that they can’t achieve their aspirations eventually give up.

So we can see how this works both positively and negatively. Once you start telling yourself that you can’t do something, you’re right! So be careful that you don’t concentrate your thoughts on what you don’t want out of life, because eventually you will attract those things to you. This even explains hypochondriacs and placebo effects. The mind works hard to align belief with reality. Instead phrase all of your goals positively, believe sincerely that you can achieve what you want in life, and fill your mind with vivid visualizations of what it will be like when you’ve actually attained your goals.

Hill says that definiteness of purpose is the starting point of all achievement. You may eke by with a decent living without any definite major purpose for your life, but you will never excel without concrete, specific goals. Hill says that financial goals in particular should be specific, measurable, and timely. Set specific goals for how much money you want to earn, specifically by what date, for example. But the example holds true for any sort of wealth, not just monetary. And most importantly, be clear and realistic about what what you will give in exchange for that wealth, what value you intend to share with the world in exchange for your success.

Figure out what your purpose is. Decide specifically what you want in life and what you are willing to give in return for it. Visualize your success and repeat to yourself often what you intend to achieve. Then back it up with massive action, and you’re certain to reach the heights of success, wealth, and influence.

Otherwise you’ll have to settle for what falls in your lap. Sometimes that’s decent, but you can’t say you never got a chance if you don’t know specifically what you want out of life: what you want to BE, DO and HAVE. When you know what you want, you will be prepared to recognize and take advantage of the opportunities that life presents to you.

(Oh P.S. the title is a silly geek reference to The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy!)

Read the original article on Thrilling Heroics here: The Secret to Life, the Universe, and Everything

That’s what my friend Alicia Dunams set out to do in her mid-20′s, but she instead found herself on a journey of personal growth and self-actualization. Alicia is the author of Amazon best-selling book Goal Digger: Lessons Learned from the Rich Men I Dated, a successful entrepreneur, real estate investor, and success coach. In her book, Alicia asks: Rather than marrying rich, why not set about to earn a few cool million yourself? Or start your own dream business?

I love Alicia’s enthusiasm because much like me, her strongest passion is to encourage and empower others to seek their full potential! Alicia educates women and empowers them to seek their own financial success, and become wealthy in all aspects of their lives, through her book, her Rich Girl Guide series, and via the new Wealthy Girl Summit she has organized.

Wealthy Girl Summit 2008 is a nationwide, four-day virtual wealth-building conference that will be held next week from January 24th – 27th. Alicia has brought together some extreme female power players to speak about personal finance, retirement planning, real estate and stock market investing, entrepreneurship, and the importance of emotional wealth and attitude!

The event is inspired by the tyrannical words of one of the many rich men she dated and interviewed for her highly successful book. Upon seeking the advice of “Mr. Rich” on how women can create wealth and become millionaires, this rich man replied “Women must compete for men. That is the only way they will become a millionaire. Women are too emotional and scattered to become their own millionaire.” Enraged by this sexist remark, Ms. Dunams set out to prove Mr. Rich’s point of view to be wrong. Ms. Dunams had a vision for a nationwide event that would, “in one fell swoop”, get the attention of young women across the country to take action and empower themselves, in a radical fashion, to be the creators of their own millionaire success. “I want Wealthy Girl Summit to become a movement.” Says Dunams. “A movement that will instill the millionaire mindset in young women to create wealth in all areas of their life.”

Headlining the dozen power speakers are serial entrepreneur and venture capitalist Christine Comaford-Lynch, financial strategist Loral Langemeier, and leading motivational speaker Marci Shimoff. Christine Comaford-Lynch is the CEO of business accelerator Mighty Ventures, personal consultant to big shots like President Bill Clinton, and author of Rules for Renegades: How to Make More Money, Rock Your Career, and Revel in Your Individuality. Loral Langemeier is author of The Millionaire Maker’s Guide to Creating a Cash Machine for Life and Director of Live Out Loud, a financial coaching and mentoring company. And Marci Shimoff is the New York Times #1 bestselling author of Chicken Soup for the Woman’s Soul and a participating teacher in the transformative film The Secret.

If you’re an entrepreneurial or success-minded young woman in your twenties or thirties, I strongly encourage you to participate in this conference. I’ve read great material from Alicia Dunams and Christine Comaford-Lynch, and have interacted with both of these awesome women, and I highly recommend their insightful lessons! 2008 is a new year, and perhaps you’ve set some powerful resolutions for yourself — to increase your income, take control of your career, or start working for yourself maybe? No matter where you are located, this nationwide teleconference and webinar should prove to be an exceptionally valuable opportunity to invest in yourself in ’08 and learn from the tremendous achievements of other successful self-made women! To become the millionaire you seek to be, or even to achieve a more humble goal, it’s all about learning to transform your mindset and beliefs, and these special guest speakers will show you how to with their proven successes! Check it out at www.WealthyGirlSummit.com

Read the original article on Thrilling Heroics here: Women, Invest in Yourselves First with the Empowering Wealthy Girl Summit 2008