Note: this article is massive, and it’s a bit more personal than I usually get, but I’ve summarized the lessons I’ve learned over the last six weeks about overcoming fear and dealing with unexpected life changes. My belief is that fear of the unknown is the only barrier between you and the life you want to have, so I’m certain almost everybody can get something out of this. Also, on a related note, if you want to take action to break each of your fears into much smaller, actionable items, to facilitate change and actually take control of your life, I highly recommend my friend Sean’s Overcoming the Fear of Uncertainty program.

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When a resolute young fellow steps up to the great bully, the world, and takes him boldly by the beard, he is often surprised to find it comes off in his hand, and that it was only tied on to scare away the timid adventurers.”

–Ralph Waldo Emerson

Maintaining relationships as a permanent traveler and entrepreneur has it’s challenges. I’ve been puzzled as to how to broach this topic here, but I recently parted ways with my (now ex-) girlfriend.

Nikki was (and always will be) a stunning, inspiring, ambitious woman. We met in Bangkok, she had built her own successful business, we saw four countries together in the last eight months alone, and together we got a beach house on beautiful Koh Phangan island in the south of Thailand. In many ways, we were the perfect travel couple. I thought I’d found the love of my life. So it’s hard to share with the whole world when you fuck something that good up.

Maybe we rushed into things. Maybe our hopes were too high. Maybe we were too alike—both A-type, hard-headed entrepreneurs, both accustomed to the ever-changing permanent travel lifestyle, and both very stubborn. We both had outside stresses, and moving from a busy city with literally hundreds of friends we could go out with nearly every day of the week, to sharing a home together for the first time, together nearly 24/7, on a small island where we didn’t know anyone, we had a few fights that escalated from bad to worse, and eventually I left Koh Phangan.

In retrospect, I don’t even remember what our arguments were about. Average disagreements, minor hurt feelings, money worries, but they would spiral out of control as we provoked each other to higher and higher stakes back and forth. Occasional fights are inevitable in long-term relationships. But perhaps we hadn’t had enough time to fully figure each other out, or maybe we both still need to learn how to handle those misunderstandings and disagreements properly with a more mature discourse.

Over the course of several months I had adjusted my business and scaled back on a lot of the projects I had been doing on my own (to clarify, she didn’t ask me to do this) to help her expand her magazine online and across Asia further. She had wanted me to potentially partner with her more officially on it, and we’d had plans to travel to South America in 2011 and do similar business there…

So when we went our separate ways, not only did I walk away from a girl that meant a tremendous amount to me, but I also became a homeless “digital drifter” again, and reverted back to solo entrepreneur. Because I had dropped a few big clients and discontinued some of the services I had been providing over the months, it’s put me at a crossroads in my business: what direction do I go? What opportunities do I get back into? Do I search for new clients or reinvent things and do something entirely new?

Not being in a committed relationship also puts me back in a position where I could almost go anywhere in the world, which is actually scary as hell. The decisions are paralyzing.

We’ve all had experiences like these—it was actually another breakup over three years ago that pushed me to move overseas—and I’ve had countless emails from readers in similar situations, who also experienced a breakup, or some other big life change.

But these big changes that we experience—losing someone you love (through a breakup, the death of someone you care about, or otherwise), having your career or your business thrown in disarray, experiencing a huge change in your living situation before you’re ready for it, trouble in your family, misunderstandings with your friends, and many other similar things—they can also bring out massive fears that—if you don’t overcome them—will put you in a rut for months or years, and may destroy you.

We may feel fear because of an experience that has happened in the past which triggers fear in the present. We might feel fear of uncertainty, or fear of the unknown. Or, we may even be frightened of doing what we’ve always wanted to do with our lives—a kind of nervous excitement, if you will.

[…] Fear is debilitating. It keeps us at a distance.  It stops us from moving forward.  It holds us back.

Our natural instinct when we begin to feel fear is avoidance.  Many people will go to unnatural extremes to avoid their fears, rather than dealing with their fear, and moving forward.”

–Brooke Ferguson

The Fear of Uncertainty

I am a firm believer that the only thing that holds you back from getting the things you want in this life is yourself—or, to be more precise, your fears.

Fear is a product of our evolution—it’s a survival response, a remnant from caveman days when we needed to remain alert and move our asses to avoid getting eaten by sabertooth tigers. But life in modern society is pretty cushy, and that inherent fear and anxiety response isn’t so useful anymore. At least I haven’t come across too many sabertooth tigers.

You’re never going to completely remove the fear. But you must master the fear if you want to be successful in life and attain your goals.

Most of us fear failure in some form or another. A lot of people stay in their 9-to-5 jobs because they fear the unknown—not having that paycheck to rely on, or they fear their own ability to go out and find enough paying clients to make a living. I experience that fear every month! Or you might fear that people will think your idea is stupid, that no one will buy. People will laugh at you because you choose to walk a different path—the unconventional path.

“Most people will choose unhappiness over uncertainty.”

–Timothy Ferriss

But it’s not going to kill you to fail. Ask anyone successful how they got there, and they will undoubtedly tell you about the many, many failed ideas and failed attempts they made before they became an “overnight” success.

Failure doesn’t have the same sharp teeth and claws that it used to. If you’re trying to do big, remarkable things in business or in life, then failure is unavoidable. It’s part of the journey, part of the learning process. And in fact, failure is only going to teach you what you didn’t know already, and it will teach you lessons to apply in your next attempt at success.

One lesson that really made a huge impact on me early on, from Ramit Sethi, is that if you’re not failing at a few things each month, then you’re not trying hard enough. Ramit keeps a folder for failures, and he’s a New York Times bestselling author now.

Mountains from Molehills

Any big life change is going to feel like an insurmountable goal before you actually achieve it. The more you think about it without taking action and getting started, the more you will build it up to be a huge challenge in your head.

I remember before I finally pulled the trigger and packed my bags to live abroad in late 2008, I was scared shitless about leaving my comfortable surroundings. I thought I might end up spending a year in Asia in complete solitude. Boy did I turn out to be wrong though! I have friends now that I would never have back home—millionaires, media personalities, nightclub owners, authors, folks from all industries and from every corner of the world.

my 2nd day in Bangkok

I made it out to be a much bigger obstacle in my head than it really turned out to be. There were plenty of challenges, as I arrived in Beijing, China, just as the Bangkok airport was closed down by political demonstrations, and they wanted to turn me around and send me back to California.

But once I was moving towards my goal, once I was on the road traveling, I was surrounded by a completely new world—foreign languages I didn’t understand at all, different social norms—and it forced me to be resourceful. I had to learn and overcome the challenges, and in fact it increased the rate at which I was learning new things and becoming more resilient.

How to Royally Fuck Up a Sure Thing

Alright, so how to actually deal with the fear…

First, I want to tell you how not to deal with your fears. This is something that I’ve probably done over and over again, and one of these days I’ll have to learn that if I want a different outcome, I have to change my behavior. But I’ll share it here so hopefully you can learn a lesson from my failure.

So to go back to the breakup, a huge fear that I’ve recognized in myself is the fear that I’ll never find the kind of companionship I want—someone to share my life with. I’m not ready to settle down in one place, and I know I’m not mature enough to get hitched just yet, but I’m pretty serious when it comes to dating, and I’m looking for the right woman to join me on my unconventional journey through life—with all the ups and downs of travel and business thrown in there.

I tend to be extremely loyal when I find someone that fits—sometimes too much so. But a common fear that crops up in my relationships is that my other half isn’t as committed to the partnership.

In Nikki, I found someone who was exceptionally like-minded—she also enjoys the unleashed travel lifestyle and has the ups and downs of entrepreneurship. Very rare, but we understood each other pretty damn well. We made an incredible couple, and had a brilliantly fun time, something I’ll always be thankful for. We were almost sickeningly cute at times, I’m sure.

The huge mistake I made, though, was letting the fear take control at the first sign that something was wrong. Seth Godin calls it the lizard brain—the fight or flight tendency.

When we fought, all my biggest fears came out: that she would leave me, or maybe that I wasn’t good enough for her, and that even if we did work things out, get through the argument and come to an understanding, eventually there would come a time when I wasn’t able to keep her happy and the relationship would fall apart anyway.

So rather than fully committing myself to working things out, getting through the argument and working at it to come to an understanding, which is the mature thing I should have done, I let my past experiences dictate my behavior, and I acted out of fear. I said things I didn’t mean. And at the end, I was the douchebag who walked away from her, because I feared she would dump me, and I was desperate to avoid that pain (real or imagined).

I feared a certain outcome, so rather than working hard at it and being there the way I should have, I overreacted out of fear and prematurely severed the relationship because I feared an unknown future. When I realized what a mistake I’d made, I spent a week or two trying to persuade her back with logical reasoning. This is exactly the opposite of what you should do. There’s no reasoning with someone to love you; I’d already lost her trust.

“Love is an act of endless forgiveness, a tender look which becomes a habit.”

–Peter Ustinov

Moral of the story: if you really want something, don’t let fear take the wheel and go into fight or flight mode. Don’t react and be a jackass when you fear an unknown outcome. Instead, stay reasonable, keep a cool head, hang in there and keep working hard, taking the steps necessary toward what you want. Because you never really know what will happen—you can’t predict the future—but a lot of people sabotage themselves, almost subconsciously, so that they don’t have to experience failure if they don’t get what they want.

This applies to relationships, but also to pretty much everything else too. Don’t do this!

Keep Your Options Open

No matter what fear you’re facing, the biggest element is that we all fear we will be ruined if we fail. Life will be over!

But that’s just not true. What you need is to figure out your options if everything goes horribly, a backup plan, if you will. A lot of times we have these fears because we don’t know what alternate options we have. So you need to spend some time and think about your options.

Tim Ferriss calls it fear-setting: you need to spend some time and think about your options if the worst case scenario happens. Try writing down exactly what would happen in the absolute worst case, if you completely and utterly fail at your goals. Then map out as many paths to recovery as you can, or alternate solutions to achieve your goal.

A few weeks after my breakup, I sat down and put together a mindmap with some of my biggest fears right now at this stage in my life: what direction to go with my business, money troubles, my fear of loneliness, and yes even the fear that I’ll never find the Mrs. Right.

Once I did this, I actually realized how many friends I had coming through to visit, how much fun was in store, I realized how many different business opportunities were already open to me, and new income streams I could start if I put in the effort, I even realized a lot of the positive things about my breakup and being on my own again. It made a huge difference in my attitude, and gave me the energy to look for new possibilities and keep pressing forward.

Once you define your worst possible outcome, and brainstorm solutions for it, you’ll see that in most cases failure will be much easier to come back from than you might fear. This should help remove a lot of the uncertainty for you in any area of your life.

Surround Yourself with Good People

I was exceptionally fortunate that I had a good friend not far from where I was: Brooke Ferguson was just a few hours away in Krabi, Thailand. I took a bus to see her, she helped me get my feet back on the ground now that I was homeless, she listened to all my braindump about what had happened, gave me lots of helpful insight, and we even got some momentum going on an exciting new project.

Several friends have actually come to visit in the last two months: Craig Gonzales, who wrote here about friendship and location independence recently, Colin Wright, Carlos Miceli, Ross Hill, Dwight Turner, Matt Goult, and others. Some were there when I needed someone to discuss my breakup and my fears with, and slowly, through many conversations, I was able to learn some important lessons and understand my mistakes a bit better.

Markus from LivingOnImpulse.com & Dwight from InSearchOfSanuk.com

Some of them were there when I just wanted to go out for drinks and a fun time. A couple joined me on the renowned rock climbing routes in Railay Beach, Krabi (which itself, like skydiving, deals with my fear of heights. Staying active, or getting involved in a new activity can be a great way to challenge yourself in new ways and overcome unique challenges that you can then also apply in other parts of your life. Like losing a toenail after four hours of climbing, and then having to climb through pitch black caves and abseil down a 100-foot limestone cliff barefoot!)

abseiling barefoot over West Railay Beach

A rare few will excel at helping guide you through your own mental process, which is exactly what Markus Urban was able to do with me when we met for a few days of food, drinks, adventure, fun, and deep conversations.

Don’t compound your fears by staying isolated from the world. Often, if you can talk things through with people who you trust, they’ll help you see new things you didn’t see on your own. Getting the support of good friends, or family, can help infuse you with the courage you need to overcome your fears. And remaining present, honest and open to old and new people around you will frequently present new opportunities that weren’t there before.

Stare Fear in the Eye

It’s likely that what you fear most is what you must do. Steve Pavlina says that whatever you fear is not really an obstacle, but a challenge that you must face:

“The reward for facing fear is that you get to be fully alive. When you turn towards your fear, you feel the breath of life blowing straight at you, and it’s very refreshing. You feel awake and energized. It’s not that you become an adrenaline junky. You simply realize that you can’t let fear stand in your way if you want to live your life consciously. Being afraid of something is no excuse for not doing it.”

–Steve Pavlina

All the big things you want to accomplish will stir up your fears to some degree, and it’s only by confronting those fears head-on that you’ll ever overcome them and achieve anything remarkable. If something seems impossible, then break it down into smaller parts, and start today on the first one that will get you going the direction you want to go.

By breaking down your huge fears into small pieces and taking action every day, you’ll start to build up resilience and tenacity in the face of those fears. And every time you have a small breakthrough or a victory over something you fear, you’ll gain more and more momentum to continue on and take on bigger and bigger challenges.

I finally decided to take initiative on a big, impossible dream I have of hosting some kind of an entrepreneurship, personal development and lifestyle design summit in the Southern California desert—a sort of unconference and retreat with inspiring, like-minded people who want to create radical change in their lives and build meaningful businesses.

As soon as I started sharing this idea with the right kind of people—a few folks who I really look up to and a few individuals who crossed paths by serendipity and shared an understanding of what change I want to make in the world—I started to get positive feedback from some who are also interested to participate and make something happen, which has given me new motivation to put in the attention and effort and make this one of my central projects in the coming months. (More on this soon, but if you want to learn from and collaborate with some remarkable people for a week in Palm Springs, say around mid-April when Coachella Music & Arts Festival is on, drop me a line.)

And in the dating arena, I’ve simply forced myself to keep being social, going out and meeting new people, bonding with new friends, and already I’ve found that there are plenty of great women out there to meet and plenty of potential for new relationships when the time is right, and maybe my huge fear that I’ll spend eternity alone isn’t true after all.

Are You Avoiding Doing Something Out of Fear?

“You miss 100% of the shots you don’t take.”

–Wayne Gretzky

Consider what you have to lose by not taking action. Will you get another chance at this? Are you happy with things as they are now, or are you miserable? Will you choose unhappiness over uncertainty?

The key to achieving your wildest goals in life is to overcome the fears that hold you back, and to question your assumptions. The more certainty you require in life, the more you will be let down and unhappy. The people who succeed are the ones who accept that much of life is uncertain, and every day will serve up new challenges. Sometimes you’ll feel prepared to handle them, but most of the time you probably won’t. You must learn to adapt quickly to change, seek out how you can turn uncertainty to your benefit, and stop being a victim—but instead start looking for the lessons you can learn from life’s challenges to make you stronger.

Here are four lessons I’ve learned as I’ve overcome big challenges and faced my fears:

1. If you feel pulled towards something, embrace it and race toward it.
2. Big life changes are never as scary as you make them out to be in your head at first.
3. No matter what happens, you will adapt to new surroundings and new things in your life surprisingly quickly.
4. Even if your plans don’t unfold how you want them to, at the very least you will experience growth and learn valuable lessons along the way.

The willingness to risk the comfort of the familiar in order to find your true happiness is the path to living a remarkable life.

“Winners expect and embrace failure as something that will remain constant throughout their lives. No matter how successful they are in whatever they do, they will have the failures to go alongside it.

Every winner out there has had to first become a Master of Failure before enjoying the winning side of life.”

–Kevin Abdulrahman

There always have been and always will be a small subset of the population who lead remarkable lives. They choose not to allow fear—of the unknown, of uncertainty, of failure—to hold them back from doing big things. They take action in the face of fear. The question is: will you choose to be one of them? Will you overcome your fears and live a remarkable life?

If So, the World Is Your Oyster!

Image: Anton Balazh

Read the original article on Thrilling Heroics here: How to Keep Kicking Ass When You Lose Everything

For readers in the States, the 4th of July is the anniversary of the day the U.S. signed the Declaration of Independence. ABC News celebrated Independence Day with an article yesterday to help wannabe freelancers declare their own independence!

Michelle Goodman, the blogger behind Anti9to5Guide.com, asked in her Career Management column at ABCnews.com, “Ever Dreamed of Working at Home in Your Pajamas? Make it Reality.” And she answered with Five Low-Cost Ways to Be Your Own Boss, an article that looks at five great occupations for new freelancers: professional organizer, copywriter, blog designer, bookkeeper, and virtual assistant.

It’s an easy read if you’re thinking about going into a freelance profession, and the cool part is that Michelle interviewed me for tips from my experience as a blog designer and consultant. This was my first time breaking into traditional media, and it was a cool opportunity for a little publicity of my freelance business, ThrillingDesign.com.

So how did I do it? I’d like to say that I was fortunate enough to score this brief interview for ABC because I was willing to invest into building a relationship. Michelle is someone I established an acquaintance with nearly a year ago when I interviewed her for Ramit Sethi’s I Will Teach You To Be Rich blog. I took a genuine interest in her work and her book The Anti 9-to-5 Guide: Practical Career Advice for Women Who Think Outside the Cube because obviously, freelancing is something I’m passionate about. We’ve stayed in touch since, and she must have kept track of me as I started up my own freelance business in the last several months. So when she was looking for a freelancer who helps business owners and writers customize their own blogs, she came to me knowing it was right up my alley.

The lesson here is simple: if you have a genuine interest in what others do—be they columnists, authors, CEOs, or whatever—don’t be afraid to reach out and ask them a few questions about it. I’ve met the second richest man in the world, and interviewed a billion-dollar hedge fund manager, and I think that almost anybody, no matter how rich, powerful, successful, or famous, likes to feel like others have a genuine interest in what they do. And often times, if you show that toward others, they will reciprocate at some point.

I feel very honored to be a part of Michelle Goodman’s piece on ABCnews.com. She’s a fantastic writer and the article takes an interesting look at the lives of a few different freelancers. She recommends you look at the Small Business Association (SBA) and SCORE if you’re interested in going self-employed, among a few other resources. I’m also looking forward to her upcoming book in October, “My So-Called Freelance Life: How to Survive and Thrive as a Creative Professional for Hire.”

She had a number of great questions for me when we spoke, but naturally there was only space for a small portion of what we discussed in the finished news article, so I’ll try to share some more thoughts on freelancing and blog design in my next post here at Thrilling Heroics.

[see: Five Low-Cost Ways to Be Your Own Boss on ABCnews.com]

Read the original article on Thrilling Heroics here: How to Make Friends with Career Columnists and Influence Mainstream News Organizations

Ladies, do you hope to find a millionaire husband? Do you want to marry rich?

That’s what my friend Alicia Dunams set out to do in her mid-20′s, but she instead found herself on a journey of personal growth and self-actualization. Alicia is the author of Amazon best-selling book Goal Digger: Lessons Learned from the Rich Men I Dated, a successful entrepreneur, real estate investor, and success coach. In her book, Alicia asks: Rather than marrying rich, why not set about to earn a few cool million yourself? Or start your own dream business?

I love Alicia’s enthusiasm because much like me, her strongest passion is to encourage and empower others to seek their full potential! Alicia educates women and empowers them to seek their own financial success, and become wealthy in all aspects of their lives, through her book, her Rich Girl Guide series, and via the new Wealthy Girl Summit she has organized.

Wealthy Girl Summit 2008 is a nationwide, four-day virtual wealth-building conference that will be held next week from January 24th – 27th. Alicia has brought together some extreme female power players to speak about personal finance, retirement planning, real estate and stock market investing, entrepreneurship, and the importance of emotional wealth and attitude!

The event is inspired by the tyrannical words of one of the many rich men she dated and interviewed for her highly successful book. Upon seeking the advice of “Mr. Rich” on how women can create wealth and become millionaires, this rich man replied “Women must compete for men. That is the only way they will become a millionaire. Women are too emotional and scattered to become their own millionaire.” Enraged by this sexist remark, Ms. Dunams set out to prove Mr. Rich’s point of view to be wrong. Ms. Dunams had a vision for a nationwide event that would, “in one fell swoop”, get the attention of young women across the country to take action and empower themselves, in a radical fashion, to be the creators of their own millionaire success. “I want Wealthy Girl Summit to become a movement.” Says Dunams. “A movement that will instill the millionaire mindset in young women to create wealth in all areas of their life.”

Headlining the dozen power speakers are serial entrepreneur and venture capitalist Christine Comaford-Lynch, financial strategist Loral Langemeier, and leading motivational speaker Marci Shimoff. Christine Comaford-Lynch is the CEO of business accelerator Mighty Ventures, personal consultant to big shots like President Bill Clinton, and author of Rules for Renegades: How to Make More Money, Rock Your Career, and Revel in Your Individuality. Loral Langemeier is author of The Millionaire Maker’s Guide to Creating a Cash Machine for Life and Director of Live Out Loud, a financial coaching and mentoring company. And Marci Shimoff is the New York Times #1 bestselling author of Chicken Soup for the Woman’s Soul and a participating teacher in the transformative film The Secret.

If you’re an entrepreneurial or success-minded young woman in your twenties or thirties, I strongly encourage you to participate in this conference. I’ve read great material from Alicia Dunams and Christine Comaford-Lynch, and have interacted with both of these awesome women, and I highly recommend their insightful lessons! 2008 is a new year, and perhaps you’ve set some powerful resolutions for yourself — to increase your income, take control of your career, or start working for yourself maybe? No matter where you are located, this nationwide teleconference and webinar should prove to be an exceptionally valuable opportunity to invest in yourself in ’08 and learn from the tremendous achievements of other successful self-made women! To become the millionaire you seek to be, or even to achieve a more humble goal, it’s all about learning to transform your mindset and beliefs, and these special guest speakers will show you how to with their proven successes! Check it out at www.WealthyGirlSummit.com

Read the original article on Thrilling Heroics here: Women, Invest in Yourselves First with the Empowering Wealthy Girl Summit 2008

My colleague Alexandra Levit, VP at Edelman global marketing communications firm, recently started up a new podcast with fellow twenty-something authors Christine Hassler and Lindsey Pollak. It’s starting as a monthly feature on BlogTalkRadio this month. The 30/20 Vision podcast is for young women professionals. Check it out, it should be a fantastic resource for young women seeking to learn from the life and career experiences of a few “big sisters.”

Read the original article on Thrilling Heroics here: An Exciting New Podcast for Young Professional Women

Karen Seeh is a young environmental professional and consultant in the Dallas/Fort Worth area, with over ten years of experience at the intersection of business and environmental sustainability. In other words, Karen has been doing this since before it was the cool thing to do! Karen exercises her passion for launching mission-based ventures as Principal of Jihi Consulting, offering business and non-profit development services, as well as by serving as an advisory board member for the Strategic Business Intelligence Group (SBIG), an informal group of professionals who promote social enterprise to the Dallas/Ft. Worth region. Karen has been involved in Net Impact, an environmental and social sustainability organization for young professionals that spans the globe, and she has spoken with me by phone before to share some great thoughts on succeeding in the sustainability niche. Here today you will learn more about the career path she has blazed for herself, and about developing trends in corporate sustainability and social enterprise.

You describe yourself as a Corporate Sustainability Strategist and a Social Enterprise Creation and Ideation consultant, which sounds very interesting! So, in layman’s terms, what do you do?

Well, as this field barely existed when I started my career 12 years ago and is still in the process of formation — I’ve done a lot of things to get to where I am today. Currently, I operate as an independent consultant providing business and non-profit development services (marketing/communications, fundraising/sales, multi-stakeholder partnerships, and strategy) to corporate social responsibility (CSR) ventures and social enterprises. I really enjoy laying the groundwork, connecting people, integrating ideas and data, and publicizing to get these ventures launched and/or scaled. And I most enjoy it when I can draw upon my experience in information technology/technology innovation, the environment, and small business and entrepreneurial development.

What does “business sustainability” mean to you?

Figuring out how to avoid the risks and take advantage of the opportunities presented to a business while still balancing economic, environmental (and human health!), and social considerations. All too often businesses focus on taking advantage of economic opportunities and only pursuing a risk management approach in terms of environmental and social considerations. This is probably not the best long-term strategy (but then how many businesses think long-term?). On the flip side, I think there is real value to be created when businesses start to think creatively about how to turn environmental and social challenges into a business opportunity.

When I say “social enterprise” in this context, I mean that the enterprise is “mission driven” — the founders have a passion for addressing a societal or environmental problem with a particular approach, service, or product. And then they just form the most appropriate vehicle around that solution (non-profit, for-profit, etc.) to accomplish the mission. Money is still important, but secondary to the mission. Especially in the case of the non-profit structure, they are often just seeking enough money to keep themselves self-financed.

Your most recent position was consulting for Envirofit International. Walk us through what a typical project like this looks like.

Envirofit is a growing clean tech non-profit in need of “expansion stage” funding. I developed a fundraising strategy and kickstarted it building relationships with government agencies, international development organizations and banks, social venture capital firms and foundations, as well as pursuing additional opportunities such as competitions, strategic partnerships, and low-cost publicity. Developing a fundraising strategy is a lot like developing a sales and marketing plan — you identify your prospects and determine your approach with each group. It’s just that non-profit fundraising is probably a lot more regimented than private sector sales and marketing; there are certain prescribed formats for letters and proposals.

You’ve worked in non-profit, government, and private business. Describe what that experience has been like, and how you got to be where you are now.

I never realized how unusual that was until I lived outside of Washington, D.C. as a professional. I formed my career in Washington, where it’s very commonplace for people to be “multi-sectoral.” It’s my sense that, at least within the space of CSR and social enterprise, the lines between these groups are increasingly becoming blurred. It was already clear to me 12 years ago when I started my career that there is no “us against them,” and the wave of the future was multi-stakeholder partnerships. Unfortunately, despite the popularity of such partnerships, they are often not as successful as they can be without mutual understanding. I think that my background enables me to provide this unique perspective.

What got you interested in sustainable development and sustainable growth?

I think it was a combination of things: many summers trips to Alaska during my high school years — was there the summer before and the summer after Exxon Valdez; saw the dried up Midwest from a plane during the summer drought of 1988. My father also worked for a large energy company, so growing up I was very aware of where my power came from — I was taught to conserve energy at a young age. Many people in my family, too, have been Peace Corps volunteers, so at a young age I was exposed to their stories about life in developing countries. I latched onto environmental issues and became a vegetarian somewhere around the age of 15…and it all evolved from there.

Do you feel like you make a positive impact with your career?

I think just about every career can be seen to have a positive impact, and some of us are more driven by impact than other motivators. I am definitely strongly driven by impact, and I do think that my career makes a positive impact at least in the short term. I cannot predict the impacts that I’ll have in the long-term. The impact that I value has changed over the years. I think it’s easy to get caught up in pursuing impact that is of national or international significance. However, all too often, such impacts lack a human connection. You may begin to wonder who did you really help. Because of this, I now gravitate toward opportunities where I can have a large impact on a small group of people or on one enterprise. Not that one way is better than the other, but you have to know what really gives you satisfaction.

When the job gets tough, what keeps you going?

I don’t know if I even think about work being “tough.” If there’s a problem that needs to be solved, it’s all I can think about to get to the bottom of it and move on. Work needs to be viewed in perspective: Think how lucky we are to even be given the opportunity of having work that also brings us great personal satisfaction. My parents and grandparents certainly did not have this. So, what on Earth do I have to complain about?

What do you recommend to students who want to get into your line of work?

I’m not quite sure if I know what “my line of work” is! I personally think it’s important to be a multi-sectoral professional and to be able to think “integratively” and creatively about business opportunities — to be able to flip an environmental challenge into a business opportunity by tapping into the resources of government agency X. But I’m not sure if a multi-sectoral career path is possible for all people, and I’m not sure if creativity is teachable.

International experience is always valuable even if you don’t intend to work internationally because it will test and change your ways of thinking about the world if you allow it to. An MBA degree helps to open doors, and these days is in demand by government, non-profit, and the private sector alike.

There are also many ways to have an impact — you don’t have to be a CSR or social enterprise professional. You can be a marketing manager who works for a green products company. You can make a bundle of money on Wall Street and then start your own foundation. There are many paths, and it’s not my place to value one over the other.

Karen, again, thank you so much for your willingness to share your incredible professional experience in corporate social responsibility and sustainability with us. For consulting inquiries, you can contact Karen at karen@jihiconsulting.com.

Read the original article on Thrilling Heroics here: An Interview with Karen Seeh, Corporate Sustainability Strategist

My fifth expert guest for the Heroines of Personal Finance and Entrepreneurship series at IWillTeachYouToBeRich.com is Michelle Goodman — a great freelance writer in Seattle. She’s written for Salon, Bust, Bitch, Bark, the Seattle Times, and the San Francisco Bay Guardian, and now she’s released her first book — The Anti 9-to-5 Guide: Practical Career Advice for Women Who Think Outside the Cube — to help wage slaves transition to flexible, alternative work, and help “cubicle expats,” as she calls them, avoid the mistakes she made early on in her self-employment. Check IWillTeachYouToBeRich.com for our discussion about the book and about women in the workplace, but here are a few extra questions with Michelle, for your reading pleasure:

Tell me all about your book The Anti 9-to-5 Guide.

The Anti 9-to-5 Guide is about working outside the typical mind-numbing 9-to-5 office grind. In the first part of the book, I tell people how to figure out what they want to do instead, research a new career path or business idea, network like crazy, and infiltrate an industry they have no experience in. In the second part, I tell people how to find and negotiate flextime and telecommuting work, start your own business, work from home without losing your mind, survive as a temp, move from corporate to nonprofit work, and work overseas, outdoors, or in a male-dominated trade. I wanted to cover as many nontraditional career paths for women as I could, from freelance writing to firefighting to flying to Japan to teach English for a couple of years.

Wow, that sounds like something I should read! Why did you write this book?

I’m a freelance writer who’s been working for herself for 15 years. I’m not a career coach per se, and I don’t want to be one. But ever since I began freelancing in 1992, people have been asking me how I continually hustle for work, woo new clients, deal with having to pick and pay for my own benefits, deal with unforeseen lags in income, stay motivated while working from home, stay connected to the rest of the world while working from home, negotiate my rates, make sense of my contracts, avoid freaking out about my lack of a steady paycheck, and on and on.

I wanted to put as many of these tips as I could into a book, essentially to write the book I wish I’d found when I first started out on my own and felt like I was feeling my way in the dark. Sure, I took a couple of business classes and glanced at a couple of “how to work solo” books back then, but I felt like the conversation was directed toward mid-lifers with money to burn, not some twenty-something who could barely afford her lunch the next day, let alone a career change. I wanted to tell people how I — and dozens of other alternatively employed women I interviewed — survived and thrived without having a benefactor, rich boyfriend, or winning Lotto ticket.

Tell us more about flex-time. What are your thoughts on the move toward work-life balance? What implications might these workplace trends have on women and men?

I love flextime and I’m happy to see Corporate America finally starting to understand that happy, less stressed-out workers make for more loyal workers, which ultimately saves in hiring and training costs. I recently was offered a several-month contract gig (i.e., temp job) out of the blue and I bit. The job was too good to refuse — and after my year-plus of writing and then promoting a book, I need money in a big way. But before the hiring manager and I even talked money, we talked about where and when I would work, because those are also deal makers/breakers for me. Here’s what I negotiated: 30 hours a week, 60% from home, Fridays off. So I will still be able to do my freelance articles, too.

As more and more Boomers retire, companies are going to have to pony up the flextime if they want to attract younger workers, working parents, and stay-at-home moms looking to return to the workforce. For some moms and dads, flextime can mean the difference between being able to work outside the home and not. Even if you can afford childcare, there are still carpools and babysitters and doctor’s visits to coordinate, and this doesn’t neatly happen outside the 9-to-5 (or 8-to-6) window. And for many people, family now comes wayyyyyy before company, so being able to be there when your kids get home from school is the number one perk.

Sometimes the need for flex hours is a bit more extreme. One woman I interviewed for an article last year had an autistic son who was very low-functioning and had seizures often. She was always having to go to his school to pick him up for one medical reason or another. But unless she could find a job that was ultra-flexible, it was going to be hard for her to work outside the home. My point is, whatever the reason, for many workers — parents, people with health issues or medical conditions in their family, or creative and office-allergic types like me — flexibility is commerce. So hopefully more and more companies will continue to show us the proverbial money.

Continue reading at IWillTeachYouToBeRich.com: Heroines of Personal Finance and Entreprenuership #5: Michelle Goodman. Buy The Anti 9-to-5 Guide: Practical Career Advice for Women that Think Outside the Cube at Amazon.com and check out her great blog at Anti9to5Guide.com for more!

Read the original article on Thrilling Heroics here: An Interview with Michelle Goodman, Author of The Anti 9-to-5 Guide

I’ve been working on a interview series over at IWillTeachYouToBeRich.com about women and their relationship with personal finance and business, featuring several successful female entrepreneurs, consultants, and freelancers. The first one-on-one is with Pamela Slim, a great gal from Mesa, AZ. Pam left the corporate world in 1996 to start Ganas Consulting, and she writes a great blog called Escape from Cubicle Nation, about transitioning from the rat race to independence! These women each have some amazing firsthand experience and a lot of great advice; they’re an amazing source of wisdom, and it’s really eye-opening to hear their viewpoints. Here’s a short excerpt:

What challenges did you have to overcome in the process of setting up Ganas? Did you face any hardships you think most men in the consulting business might not face?

I actually had it pretty easy when I started my business since I got a nice, juicy client right off the bat (Hewlett Packard) and a six-month project that guaranteed I could pay my bills without worrying about hustling for new work. Since I was selling my brain and not a physical product, there were no big start-up costs or financing hurdles, which is sometimes where you hear stories of slightly increased challenges for women to get VC funding or bank loans.

My challenge in the early years had to do with pricing my services appropriately, since I tended to undervalue my services and felt uncomfortable asking for “too much.” I know that this is something that affects many new entrepreneurs, but in my 11+ years of self-employment experience, I would say that it affects women at a much higher ratio then men. It could be that there is a big conspiracy by the misogynistic male white corporate machine that starts to disempower us in kindergarten and stop us from all kinds of things like getting into math, finance and engineering careers. I discount nothing, as I was raised with a healthy dose of skepticism and a fondness for theories of oppression.

Another likely theory is that females are raised in many societies to be in a “helper” and “nurturer” role, and to downplay material gain. Fathers historically talk to sons more about business and finance than they do their daughters. Women are taught to compromise and broker peace, not to engage in hardball negotiations. Whatever the cause of my beliefs, I had to get over some ineffective mental blocks in order to charge what I was worth. I am always curious what other women (and men!) think about this topic, so please comment here.

You say you went through a phase of self-employment evangelism. What are some of the more effective methods you found to encourage others to go solo?

My best experience with encouragement is through my blog. I call it the Magical Mystery Tour, because ever since I began to write it, I have experienced a strange and wondrous connection with thousands of people I never would have had the chance to talk to. I never know which topic or post is going to make an impact…sometimes what I consider the most off-topic or “out there” subjects get the most heartfelt responses. Perhaps my favorite compliment ever came from a reader who told me that I represented “virtual hope.” How cool is that? I would like to stress that my goal is not to have everyone in the world quit their corporate job to start a business. Some are not ready, equipped or naturally suited to self-employment. What I do want to do is demystify the process so that more people feel comfortable exploring the option to see if it is right for them.

Continue reading at IWillTeachYouToBeRich.com: Heroines of Personal Finance and Entrepreneurship #1: Pamela Slim.

Read the original article on Thrilling Heroics here: An Interview with Pamela Slim of Escape From Cubicle Nation